Bye, Bye Grandma

Dear William and Claudia,

Your Grandma passed away on Friday, July 21 2017. She took her last breath at 5:30 in the evening. We got a call from the Symphony nurse at 5:40. 

There are many things to write, but I don't have it in me right now to put so many feelings into words. Just know that Grandma loved you very much and she will always be with you.

Love,
Mommy



http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/nwitimes/obituary.aspx?n=viola-marie-knoll-zielinski&pid=186180493&fhid=2079

Grandma

Dear William and Claudia,

Yesterday when we visited Grandma, you both sensed my sadness and fear. As we entered the front doors of Symphony, Grandma's assisted living home, you, Claudia, grabbed my hand it held it as we walked down the hall. That helped me tremendously. I stopped at the nurses station and the two of you walked into Grandma's room without any hesitation. I know this is hard to do because we don't know what condition we are going to find Grandma in during each visit. Will she be able to recognize us? Will she be able to communicate? Everyday changes. It's hard to predict.

As we sat with Grandma in her room, I had to step out. Cause tears were uncontrollably falling from my eyes. William, you hugged and patted my arm. You comforted me. I love you because you always are in tune to my feelings.

This is a hard time for me. Grandma has caused me a lot of hurt for a long time. Yet, it makes me sad seeing her so ill. I don't know if she has the capability to think, but not verbally communicate. Or she  is just not aware of what is happening to her. I hope she is not aware.

I have been praying to God to take her soon. I've asked Grandma to come and be with her. It's time for Grandma to be with your Grandpa now.

I am so grateful for your understanding and the love you have shown me.

Love,

Mommy
XOXO

Grandma

Dear William and Claudia

As you know, Grandma is dying. She has pancreatic cancer. We found out in May after a lot of confusion as to where the cancer originated from. After finally hearing the results, stage 4 pancreatic cancer, Grandma decided she did not want chemotherapy. We told her we respected her decision. Her doctor would not tell us how much time she had left. I realize that it is often a guessing game, and that doctors don't want to give an estimate. Personally, I feel she has given up. She wants to be with your Grandpa. She has wanted to be with him since he left us.

We are out of school for the summer which makes it so much easier to visit her. Lately, she is spending most of her time in bed. She got up for a little bit today when she saw you two! She had a few sips of water and a piece of watermelon. Then she asked to go back to bed. She also asked for pain medication. The nurse said the meds would make her sleep for awhile so we left.

I am sorry kids. You never got to know your Grandpa, and now your Grandma is leaving you. Keep
her in your prayers. She loves you.

Love,
Mommy

Silly Willy Part 2

William-Dad, guess who sold me a hot dog at Costco?

Brian- no answer 

William- It was JESUS! Jesus sold me a holy hot dog! Can you believe it? I also drank a Sprite from heaven. 

Brian- still no response 

William- I should have asked Jesus how the family was doing...

Silly Willy

I really think stores should offer childcare for shoppers. We went to Costco today where William disappeared numerous times. Once I found him in a shed singing the theme song from Curious George. He was definitely riding the crazy train today. The monkey songs continued during the whole shopping trip! Our cashier's name was Jesus. According to William, Jeee-sus was alive and in the building. He shared this with me and Claudia very loudly. When we got into the van to head home, Peter Gabriel's "Shock the Monkey" was on the radio. William was horrified that a song was written called "Chop the Monkey" but continued to sing along with it adding George and the man with the yellow hat to the lyrics. It was an exhausting trip. I can't even begin to explain all the "events" that took place between our house and the Costco store. I need a drink!

Back to School 2015

Fourth and Fifth grades here we come!

Fourth and Fifth Grades

I had to force you to hold hands for a few seconds!

Poor little Snoopy did not want them to leave :(

First Communion

Claudia's Love Letter

My Love Letter

Thank you to my sweet Claudia. You left me a love letter on my pillow this morning. You are so kind and thoughtful. This made me smile and filled my heart with love! Love you!!!

Poems From Claudia

Night Time

 

Sky is dark

Stars appearing

Owl Flying

Mouse beware!

 

 

Bacon

 

Bacon is red

Bacon is rough

But one strip is never enough!

Spring Break 2014

Exploring Ogden Gardens

Road trip to Pokagon with the Bentons

Refilling the bird feeders at Pokagon

Hiking with Matthew

Turtle time!

Claudia and her buddy



Hiking at Rogers Lakewood Park

Playing Legos in our jammies :)

Mornings

Both of my kids have inherited Brian's "I have no sense of time" gene and it's making me crazy! Trying to get them fed, dressed and to school on time, is hell. William talks a mile a minute and "forgets" to eat then cries because he's "starving" Today he serenaded us with, "butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt" sung to the tune of jingle bells. He continued to sing while spinning in circles completely unaware of the importance of putting clothes on for school, couldn't find his shoes and probably never brushed his teeth. I threatened to take him to school in his pjs...he thought that was cool. Claudia instigates and makes things even worse. I finally had it and yelled that I would be waiting in the car. Five minutes pass. No kids. I walk back to the house to find them searching for me. They forgot to look in the car! How I managed 40 fifth graders during my teaching days, but can't manage 2 of my own is a complete mystery to me. Plus this morning's chaos was witnessed by Collin, the bathroom renovation man. Love having an audience when I'm close to a breakdown.

Claudia's Song

Claudia wrote a song the other day while we were running errands.  I found her lyrics stuffed in the back seat pocket of the van.  Her song goes like this....

I love you

You love me

So, let's go and play today

While the heavens are bright

And by the star's twinkling light

So, what do you say

Why don't we go and play today

While the heavens are bright

And by the star's twinkling light

I say we should play

Because I love you

And you love me

So, let's go and play today

In the Closet

Last night, I found my undiagnosed narcoleptic husband asleep on the closet floor again.... lights off, wearing winter boots and layers of clothes.  He claimed to be stretching.

Whatever!

Pinewood Derby 2014

William,

You were the big winner at Pinewood Derby this year. Congratulations and "GO DITKA"!

Still Living in Shitville...

Four days of Facebook Status updates...

Day 1) Still living in Shitville. My sliding van door chose not to close this morning on automatic or manual. At Honda dealer now. Don't worry, Colleen, I didn't lose any of the kids on the way to school.

MY COMMENTS:

• The Guy next to me is cracking his gum and the three ladies (using that loosely) have said "ain't no" and "shit" at least a dozen times. I am surrounded by NW Indiana's finest. I may have to smack this man. Disgusting!
• Now the lady wants to "learn me" how to shoot a handgun
• And the guy is blowing bubbles. I am going to start dry heaving
•  I finally made it home with closed doors. I think it was freak day at the Honda dealer! That guy kept on cracking and popping and cracking... I wanted to smash his face. And there was no where to go other than the bathroom or the kiddie room. I considered the showroom floor, but there were salesmen all over. One of those 3 ladies was sitting on a couch in the most inappropriate way ever... she certainly got the gum poppers attention. Gross, gross, gross! All I want is a few days of quiet so I can finally put away all of my Christmas stuff (tree included).

THE DEALER SAID THE BATTERY WAS THE CULPRIT... IT MUST BE REPLACED AND THE DOORS HAVE TO BE "RELEARNED".  ME-- BUT WHY WON'T IT CLOSE ON "MANUAL?" NO RESPONSE...

Day 2) Today, I am living in the town of Deep Shitville. I dropped the kids off at Art Club this morning and guess what? THE VAN DOOR WOULDN'T CLOSE! Called the Honda dealer who explained the door not closing was all based on the battery (which the turds replaced). I then asked why it wouldn't close and latch manually... she didn't know and told me to bring it back in! I have a freakin' 8 foot wheelchair ramp, that I accidentally delivered to my house instead of my mom's, to move and install today. I don't have time for another trip (with an open door) into Merrillville to sit around with Walmart rejects (see yesterday's FB rant).

Day 3)  Guess where I went this morning? Yes, the Honda dealer again because the same door flew open and won't latch. The dealer is now blaming the cold and the child safety lock. Whatever!

IT'S BEEN COLD ALL WINTER AND THE DOOR LATCHED! EXPLAINED THAT HONDA MECHANIC!

Day 4)  Honda Dealer just called to tell me my door latch has failed all the tests and would be $700 to replace. Wondering why they couldn't figure this out when I told them the DOOR WOULDN'T LATCH on my first trip over there! I am waiting for another quote from Dave's Automotive in Valpo. Should have gone there first!

I TOOK THE CAR TO DAVE'S WHERE THEY QUICKLY REPLACED THE LATCH WITH A HONDA PART ONLY CHARGED ME $450!

Living in Shitville

I just found this magazine order form in our playroom. Looks like my son changed my name to Butt and I now live on Crap Street in the town of Shitville. Can't wait for him to come home from school today...

Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow...

William and Claudia,

 

This has been your snowiest and coldest winter ever!  Lots of snow days, lots of two hour delays, lots of icicles, lots of fun! We loved it! Many years from now, you will be telling your kids about the winter of 2014, just as Mom and Dad told you about our childhood winter of 1978-1979!

 

 

Claudia and her neighbor buddy

Claudia and E.

William and the Snow Banks

The Three Amigos at the end of our driveway

Looking out my bedroom window...

Bedroom Window...

It actually got colder than this!

Our house... it's like living in a snow globe

William and Brian playing football

Walking down Walnut Street.
(Photo by Lori)

Crappy ( and Pissy) Thursday

Another fun morning at the Stage house. The dogs refused to potty outside in the rain, the older dog puked up all the birdseed she has been eating from the ground ON MY BED, and the cat peed all over a basket of clean clothes.... I didn't realize this until I pulled clothes out of the basket to get dressed. Nothing says "good morning" like a bra full of cat pee. Looks like my day will be full of laundry. Sigh...

Sue's Birthday

Dear Brian,

Thank you so much for cramming in a few minutes the night before taking the time to make my birthday great.  I know birthdays, Christmas, anniversaries, and any other day that requires planning, and possible gift giving, is traumatic and nearly impossible for you. But, this year you actually managed to pull it off. 

The picture frames the kids decorated and photos were cute.  And the lovely bath products you selected to use in our new bathtub are perfect. I can't wait for the new tub to be installed so I can use them.

Thank you for giving me the night off from cooking supper and for picking up the Narnia movie.

See, Brian, you are indeed capable of birthday planning. 

Sue

Back to School

First day of School 2013

Walking to School... Second and Third Grades