Monday, July 31, 2017

Bye, Bye Grandma

Dear William and Claudia,

Your Grandma passed away on Friday, July 21 2017. She took her last breath at 5:30 in the evening. We got a call from the Symphony nurse at 5:40. 

There are many things to write, but I don't have it in me right now to put so many feelings into words. Just know that Grandma loved you very much and she will always be with you.

Love,
Mommy



http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/nwitimes/obituary.aspx?n=viola-marie-knoll-zielinski&pid=186180493&fhid=2079




Sunday, July 16, 2017

Grandma

Dear William and Claudia,

Yesterday when we visited Grandma, you both sensed my sadness and fear. As we entered the front doors of Symphony, Grandma's assisted living home, you, Claudia, grabbed my hand it held it as we walked down the hall. That helped me tremendously. I stopped at the nurses station and the two of you walked into Grandma's room without any hesitation. I know this is hard to do because we don't know what condition we are going to find Grandma in during each visit. Will she be able to recognize us? Will she be able to communicate? Everyday changes. It's hard to predict.

As we sat with Grandma in her room, I had to step out. Cause tears were uncontrollably falling from my eyes. William, you hugged and patted my arm. You comforted me. I love you because you always are in tune to my feelings.

This is a hard time for me. Grandma has caused me a lot of hurt for a long time. Yet, it makes me sad seeing her so ill. I don't know if she has the capability to think, but not verbally communicate. Or she  is just not aware of what is happening to her. I hope she is not aware.

I have been praying to God to take her soon. I've asked Grandma to come and be with her. It's time for Grandma to be with your Grandpa now.

I am so grateful for your understanding and the love you have shown me.

Love,

Mommy
XOXO




Wednesday, June 28, 2017

Grandma

Dear William and Claudia

As you know, Grandma is dying. She has pancreatic cancer. We found out in May after a lot of confusion as to where the cancer originated from. After finally hearing the results, stage 4 pancreatic cancer, Grandma decided she did not want chemotherapy. We told her we respected her decision. Her doctor would not tell us how much time she had left. I realize that it is often a guessing game, and that doctors don't want to give an estimate. Personally, I feel she has given up. She wants to be with your Grandpa. She has wanted to be with him since he left us.

We are out of school for the summer which makes it so much easier to visit her. Lately, she is spending most of her time in bed. She got up for a little bit today when she saw you two! She had a few sips of water and a piece of watermelon. Then she asked to go back to bed. She also asked for pain medication. The nurse said the meds would make her sleep for awhile so we left.

I am sorry kids. You never got to know your Grandpa, and now your Grandma is leaving you. Keep
her in your prayers. She loves you.

Love,
Mommy

Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Silly Willy Part 2

William-Dad, guess who sold me a hot dog at Costco?

Brian- no answer 

William- It was JESUS! Jesus sold me a holy hot dog! Can you believe it? I also drank a Sprite from heaven. 

Brian- still no response 

William- I should have asked Jesus how the family was doing...

Silly Willy

I really think stores should offer childcare for shoppers. We went to Costco today where William disappeared numerous times. Once I found him in a shed singing the theme song from Curious George. He was definitely riding the crazy train today. The monkey songs continued during the whole shopping trip! Our cashier's name was Jesus. According to William, Jeee-sus was alive and in the building. He shared this with me and Claudia very loudly. When we got into the van to head home, Peter Gabriel's "Shock the Monkey" was on the radio. William was horrified that a song was written called "Chop the Monkey" but continued to sing along with it adding George and the man with the yellow hat to the lyrics. It was an exhausting trip. I can't even begin to explain all the "events" that took place between our house and the Costco store. I need a drink!

Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Back to School 2015

Fourth and Fifth grades here we come!
Fourth and Fifth Grades

I had to force you to hold hands for a few seconds!

Poor little Snoopy did not want them to leave :(

Thursday, June 19, 2014

Claudia's Love Letter



My Love Letter

Thank you to my sweet Claudia. You left me a love letter on my pillow this morning. You are so kind and thoughtful. This made me smile and filled my heart with love! Love you!!!

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Poems From Claudia

Night Time
 
Sky is dark
Stars appearing
Owl Flying
Mouse beware!
 
 
Bacon
 
Bacon is red
Bacon is rough
But one strip is never enough!

Friday, April 11, 2014

Spring Break 2014

Exploring Ogden Gardens



Road trip to Pokagon with the Bentons

Refilling the bird feeders at Pokagon

Hiking with Matthew

Turtle time!

Claudia and her buddy


Hiking at Rogers Lakewood Park

Playing Legos in our jammies :)